webshells.com/nwuco Forum
Author | Jim Devine |
Date | 06/11/08/09:06 |
Hit Count | 662 |
IN THE WEE hours of the morning after American voters swept his party
from power, President George W. Bush made an extraordinary appearance on national television to ask the national electorate for a "do-over." Millions of viewers were tuned into televised Election Night coverage when Mr. Bush, using the nation's Emergency Broadcasting System, interrupted those telecasts to make a direct appeal to the American people. Looking unshaven and unsteady, and occasionally slurring his words, the president implored the American people to invalidate the results of last night's election and vote again. "I grew up with the great tradition of do-overs on the golf courses of Greenwich, Connecticut," Mr. Bush told the American people. "And what's good for golf is good for democracy." Mr. Bush said that if the American people would grant him a do-over, he would gladly fire Defense Secretary Donald Rumsfeld, referring to his longtime Cabinet member as "that loser." Across the country, voters registered shock and astonishment at the unorthodox speech by Mr. Bush, many of them troubled by the president's decision to appear on national television wearing only a stained undershirt. One hour after the president's address, Democratic National Committee chairman Howard Dean delivered the official Democratic response: "He must be on crack." But minutes after Mr. Dean's appearance, Mr. Bush interrupted the networks' broadcasts once more, raising the ante in his bid for a do-over: "All right, I'll fire Cheney's ass, too, but that's my final offer." Elsewhere, among the many who lost once-secure positions yesterday were Sen. Rick Santorum (R-Penn), Sen. Lincoln Chaffeee (R-R.I.), and Britney Spears' husband Kevin Federline. [by Andy Borowitz] |