|HOW TO KEEP A HEALTHY LEVEL OF INSANITY IN AN INSANE WORLD"
1) At lunch time, sit in your parked car w/sunglasses on and point a hair
dryer at passing cars. See if they slow down.
2) Page yourself over the intercom. Don't disguise your voice.
3) Insist that your email address is:
4) Every time someone asks you to do something, ask if they want fries
5) Encourage your colleagues to join you in a little synchronized chair
6) Put your garbage can on your desk and label it "IN."
7) In the memo field of all your checks, write 'for sexual favors.'
8) Reply to everything someone says with, "That's what you think!"
9) Finish all your sentences with "In accordance with the prophecy."
10) Dont use any punctuation
11) As often as possible, skip rather than walk.
12) Ask people what sex they are. Laugh hysterically after they answer.
13) Specify that your drive-through order is "to go."
14) Sing along at the opera.
15) Go to a poetry recital and ask why the poems don't rhyme.
16) Send e-mail to the rest of the company to tell them what you're doing.
For example, "If anyone needs me, I'll be in the rest room, in Stall #3."
17) Put mosquito netting around your cubicle. Play a tape of jungle sounds
18) Five days in advance, tell your friends you can't attend their party
because you're not in the mood.
19) Call the psychic hotline and don't say anything.
20) Have your coworkers address you by your wrestling name, Rock Hard.
21) When the money comes out of the ATM, scream "I Won!", "I Won!" "3rd
time this week!!!"
22) When leaving the zoo, start running towards the parking lot, yelling
"Run for your lives, they're loose!"
23) Tell your children over dinner. "Due to the economy, we are going to
have to let one of you go."
24) Every time you see a broom, yell "Honey, your mother is here!"
And the final way to keep a healthy level of insanity....
25) Send this e-mail to everyone in your address book, even if they sent
it to you or have asked you not to send them stuff like this.