webshells.com/nwuco Forum
webshells.com/nwuco Forum
| Author | Jim Devine |
| Date | 07/04/09/06:42 |
| Hit Count | 796 |
| Bush: Ahmadinejad Must Dismantle Last Name
Threatens Sanctions Against Polysyllabic Leader [by Andy Borowitz] THE WAR OF words between the United States and Iran heated up today as President George W. Bush demanded that Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad dismantle his last name or face serious sanctions. Speaking from the Rose Garden at the White House, Mr. Bush made it clear that he believed Mr. Ahmadinejad's possession of a difficult-to-pronounce, polysyllabic last name was a provocative act that the United States was not prepared to tolerate. "The time has come for the Iranian president to make a choice," Mr. Bush warned. "Does he want to continue down this dangerous, polysyllabic path, or does he want to join the community of peace-loving, monosyllabic world leaders?" Under a plan being floated through diplomatic channels, Mr. Ahmadinejad's last name would be subject to U.N. inspections and then dismantled syllable by syllable, ultimately to be stored in a secure U.S. military facility in Tennessee. Mr. Bush's warning to President Ahmadinejad predictably garnered the support of several of his monosyllabic counterparts, such as Britain's Tony Blair, South Korea's Roh Moo Hyun and the Czech Republic's Václav Klaus. But his strong rhetoric was less warmly received by members of the so-called "polysyllabic movement," led by Equatorial Guinea's President Teodoro Obiang Nguema Mbasogo. "We in the polysyllabic movement were offended by the president's remarks," Mr. Mbasogo said. "If Mr. Bush can pronounce the word 'polysyllabic,' he should have no problem with 'Ahmadinejad.'" |