The Teabagger Pledge
Source Dave Anderson
Date 09/09/22/07:57

Via Daily Kos

I, ________________________, do solemnly swear to uphold the
principles of a socialism-free society and heretofore pledge my word
that I shall strictly adhere to the following:

I will complain about the destruction of 1st Amendment Rights in
this country, while I am duly being allowed to exercise my 1st
Amendment Rights.

I will complain about the destruction of my 2nd Amendment Rights in
this country, while I am duly being allowed to exercise my 2nd
Amendment rights by legally but brazenly brandishing unconcealed
firearms in public.

I will foreswear the time-honored principles of fairness, decency,
and respect by screaming unintelligible platitudes regarding tyranny,
Nazi-ism, and socialism at public town halls. Also.

I pledge to eliminate all government intervention in my life. I
will abstain from the use of and participation in any socialist goods
and services including but not limited to the following:

* Social Security

* Medicare/Medicaid

* State Children's Health Insurance Programs (SCHIP)

* Police, Fire, and Emergency Services

* US Postal Service

* Roads and Highways

* Air Travel (regulated by the socialist FAA)

* The US Railway System

* Public Subways and Metro Systems

* Public Bus and Lightrail Systems

* Rest Areas on Highways

* Sidewalks

* All Government-Funded Local/State Projects (e.g., see Iowa
2009 federal senate appropriations)

* Public Water and Sewer Services (goodbye socialist toilet,
shower, dishwasher, kitchen sink, outdoor hose!)

* Public and State Universities and Colleges

* Public Primary and Secondary Schools

* Sesame Street

* Publicly Funded Anti-Drug Use Education for Children

* Public Museums

* Libraries

* Public Parks and Beaches

* State and National Parks

* Public Zoos

* Unemployment Insurance

* Municipal Garbage and Recycling Services

* Treatment at Any Hospital or Clinic That Ever Received
Funding From Local, State or Federal Government (pretty much all of

* Medical Services and Medications That Were Created or Derived
>From Any Government Grant or Research Funding (again, pretty much all
of them)

* Socialist Byproducts of Government Investment Such as Duct
Tape and Velcro (Nazi-NASA Inventions)

* Use of the Internets, email, and networked computers, as the
DoD's ARPANET was the basis for subsequent computer networking

* Foodstuffs, Meats, Produce and Crops That Were Grown With,
Fed With, Raised With or That Contain Inputs From Crops Grown With
Government Subsidies

* Clothing Made from Crops (e.g. cotton) That Were Grown With
or That Contain Inputs From Government Subsidies

If a veteran of the government-run socialist US military, I will
forego my VA benefits and insist on paying for my own medical care

I will not tour socialist government buildings like the Capitol in
Washington, D.C.

I pledge to never take myself, my family, or my children on a tour
of the following types of socialist locations, including but not
limited to:

* Smithsonian Museums such as the Air and Space Museum or
Museum of American History

* The socialist Washington, Lincoln, and Jefferson Monuments

* The government-operated Statue of Liberty

* The Grand Canyon

* The socialist World War II and Vietnam Veterans Memorials

* The government-run socialist-propaganda location known as
Arlington National Cemetery

* All other public-funded socialist sites, whether it be in my
state or in Washington, DC

I will urge my Member of Congress and Senators to forego their
government salary and government-provided healthcare.

I will oppose and condemn the government-funded and therefore
socialist military of the United States of America.

I will boycott the products of socialist defense contractors such
as GE, Lockheed-Martin, Boeing, Northrop Grumman, General Dynamics,
Raytheon, Humana, FedEx, General Motors, Honeywell, and hundreds of
others that are paid by our socialist government to produce goods for
our socialist army.

I will protest socialist security departments such as the Pentagon,
FBI, CIA, Department of Homeland Security, TSA, Department of Justice
and their socialist employees.

Upon reaching eligible retirement age, I will tear up my socialist
Social Security checks.

Upon reaching age 65, I will forego Medicare and pay for my own
private health insurance until I die.


_____________ _________________________

Signed Printed Name/Town and State

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